Are You Ok?

View of the sur by Friedrich Carl von Scheidlin

I'm at a point in life where I'm throwing my hands up and calling things out as they are.

If I have to have one more surface-level conversation, I may stop conversing altogether. It seems lost on us all that our interactions, for the most part, don't even begin to scratch the surface of what it means to be human, what it means to deeply connect with another. What it means to activate, heighten, and truly feel the depths of the oceans of emotions that swirl within each of us - even those of us who struggle to express vulnerability.

Heads up - Vulnerability is the new cool.

We are not connecting in the way that is possible—and even necessary. The expanse of our heart is boundless, and we all are longing for something perhaps that we cannot articulate. Longing in silence for something more, a sense of something we don't just access at will as we should.

Words seem to elude so often what it is our heart is longing for.

As a communications expert, I find it astounding that people don't seem to understand that communication is not about talking, but about connecting. Where two hearts can go in a moment of surrender far exceeds exchanging pleasantries.

I'm sick of the "Hey, how are you?" and "What do you do?" and "How's it going?"

I want to trade it for "Where are you?" "What does that mean?" "What matters the most right now in this singular moment?" And last, but not least - “Are You Ok?”

Why have we collectively agreed to respond with "I'm fine" and "Everything's great" and "Oh, I'm a writer," or "I'm an engineer," or "I'm a teacher" as a response?

Why do we spew it, and why is that accepted without questioning or calling for more?

What race are we off to finish? What finish line do we need to get to? What is distracting you that can't wait and be surrendered completely just for this moment, this hour, while we connect deeply with a loved one without distractions? Without the need to hold our phones as if we need a fidget item for some sort of underlying anxiety that is calmed through the sensory touch and feel of our device.

These rituals we've cemented ourselves to—of "fines" and "goods"—have slowly yet permanently disconnected us from ourselves and others.

So I ask you this: What would happen if, just once today, you asked someone not "How are you?" but "Are you okay?"—and then waited, with your full presence, for their answer? How might that moment of genuine connection change both of you?

For more listen in to this powerful conversation from the Podcast with Interventionist Aaron Huey on standing in the darkness with loved ones.

It’s a powerful listen.

Ep. 200 - Blossom Your Awesome Podcast ———— Are You Ok? With Aaron Huey